That's actually not an order. You absolutely do not have to buy my book. If you don't there will be no repercussions whatsoever and nothing bad will happen to you. However, if you do, in addition to having a very good time, laughing and learning a lot about me and The New Yorker cartoons, You will:
That's right, your own signed copy. And sometimes because it's so boring just signing copies, I also draw a cartoon inside as well. So some of you will get that too. And, by the way, if down the road, that makes your copy more valuable, I'd like it back. Ok, ok, you can keep it but if you put it up on Ebay and sell it for some good bucks I think it only fair we split it. To get a signed copy, order it on PayPal by clicking the button below.
Yes, if you fill out this form, your email will actually reach me. And I promise to respond unless you're French. Just kidding, mes amis francais. J'adore le francais. And I'm a big Jerry Lewis fan myself.
Reporters, bloggers, bookers! My people are here for you. They're standing by on their iPhones, iPads and all electronic gadgetry now in existence or just about to be invented.
Call Melanie to request a media interview. Contact Paige to book a live appearance, lecture or book signing. All oter inquiries can be directed to Cory and Danielle at Whittier & Associates, Inc. Oh, and if you're a medium, contact my mother (deceased) and tell her I'll visit more often in the next life.